Thursday, February 18, 2010

WWE MAGAZINE: A RETROSPECTIVE OF THE AWESOME, THE NOSTALGIC, AND THE HILARIOUS

After a random late-night Q&A tweetfest with WWE Magazine, I started thinking about my favourite and most memorable covers.


I had a subscription when I was 10, so the 96/97 covers all bring instant feelings of nostalgia (which co-exists nicely with our 1997 Odyssey). My most awkward memory has to be hiding a certain issue of WWF RAW Magazine from my parents, because Sunny was pictured inside wearing nothing but a bow. I wore nothing but a boner. TOO FAR.


Anyway, after taking a look back at some past WWE Magazine covers, I've narrowed it down to this: they can range from nostalgic, to completely awesome, to just smack-yourself-in-the-face hilarious. Here we go.


THE NOSTALGIC

1996/97 was a key period for me, and the WWF. Mainly because it RULED. All of these images strike deep in my heart and I can vividly remember cutting pictures out of these magazines and making WWF collages. Yes. I was that nerdy.



I think I mostly remember the ad that was always on the backs of WWF Magazines back in the day, that also featured this picture.



This might be my favourite ever. I remember actually asking my dad who I should cheer for when Bret fights Undertaker, since they were my two favourite wrestlers. What a loser child I was.



I remember finding out that Sid won the title by using a camera at recess the next day. Recess was like the internet.




See you 12 WrestleMania's from now, DEADMAN.


THE AWESOME

There are just some AMAZING covers in the history of this magazine. Some are great visually, others straight up predict the future. A lot of them happen to be WWF RAW Magazine covers, but hey, that's only because that magazine ruled too.






I believe this was the aforementioned Sunny issue.



I just think this is such a cool cover. There's something really striking about it that I can't put my finger on.



Just two badass shots of two badass dudes.



Okay, I hate the Ultimate Warrior now... but when I was 5 he was so cool. And so is this cover.



INTEGRITIES. GENIUS.



American Badass Undertaker like 4 years before it actually happened.



World Champs.



Plus, by special request:



THE HILARIOUS

There were way too many. I had to cut it down.



The traditional shirtless, towelled, champagne-shower totally not gay victory celebration.



Don't know why this makes me laugh.



Surely there was a better picture from this photoshoot that they could've used, as opposed to Bulldog's "who farted" look.



I don't know what to make of the look Bret is giving Razor. But I do know that this cover clearly implies that there's going to be one weird gangbang once the shoot is over.



I don't want to know what Chyna's Secret is... but I fear we all already know. EW.



Just so you know, this picture is from the mid-nineties. Just thought I'd fill you in, because Luger clearly didn't know. He looks like Murphy Brown.



The hot dog has to be the worst sexual innuendo ever. First off, looking at this picture objectively, it's a skeezy dude in a towel and a bow tie, surrounded by women, holding a plate of hot dogs. Even if you accept the sexual innuendo, he'd still be a dude holding a plate of penises.



WHO APPROVED THIS? "Yeah, Hogan looks fine whatever just PRINT IT ALREADY!"


But this has to be my all-time favourite:



Thanks for giving us the internet, Hitman!

3 comments:

  1. ok so i don't know how to post pictures in here. but my favorite magazine cover maybe ever, is from the Raw variety.

    so Mitch, i am gonna grow my hair back long, so we can re-enact the february 1998 issue of raw magzine, me as shawn, with your belt, and you as HHH and steve as Chyna.

    please

    ReplyDelete
  2. oh man.. somehow I missed this post until now. the Hogan/Warrior one is amazing.

    ReplyDelete