Sunday, December 13, 2009

WWE TLC: TABLES, LADDERS AND CHAIRS PREDICTIONS


These may seem late, but I'm catching the uh... er... replay.

UNIFIED TAG TEAM CHAMPIONSHIP TLC MATCH
JERISHOW (C) VS. DX
DX def. Jerishow to win their first Tag Team Championship in the Main Event
- There's a crazy ass celebration with explosions and green confetti and glowstick raves
- Shawn Michaels scares us all to death by taking a way too dangerous ladder bump
- Big Show accidentally KO's Jericho
- There is a near match-ruining appearance by Hornswoggle

WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPIONSHIP CHAIRS MATCH
UNDERTAKER (C) VS. BATISTA
Batista def. Undertaker to win the World Heavyweight Championship
- This match will surprisingly have good psychology and drama
- Batista gets injured during the match, still wins, then forfeits the title at the Slammy's

WWE CHAMPIONSHIP TABLES MATCH
JOHN CENA (C) VS. SHEAMUS
John Cena def. Sheamus to retain his WWE Championship
- TOP ROPE TABLE FU WHOAMG
- Somehow Sheamus also puts Cena through a table
- Sheamus fucks something up

ECW CHAMPIONSHIP LADDER MATCH
CHRISTIAN (C) VS. SHELTON BENJAMIN
Christian def. Shelton Benjamin to retain his ECW Championship
- MOTN
- Goes on first to keep as much separation between ladder matches as possible
- Shelton defies gravity with some new fangled ladder move that blows everyone's mind, but people still somehow forget about him the next time he appears on TV

INTERCONTINENTAL CHAMPIONSHIP MATCH
JOHN MORRISON (C) VS. DREW MCINTYRE
John Morrison def. Drew McIntyre via DQ to retain his Intercontinental Championship
- Surprisingly short
- Ends in either a DQ or some kinda draw/double countout/shmoz scenerio (I went with DQ)
- McIntyre looks crazy strong

RUBBER MATCH
KOFI KINGSTON VS. RANDY ORTON
Randy Orton def. Kofi Kingston
- Even though it seems like that Kofi will and probably should get the win, I get the feeling that Orton will somehow get the win on PPV
- Kofi will still look like a star
- Even if Orton loses, he'll get the last laugh somehow

WOMEN'S CHAMPIONSHIP MATCH
MICHELLE MCCOOL (C) VS. MICKIE JAMES
Michelle McCool def. Mickie James to retain her Women's Championship
- Mickie James has a hilarious botch
- McCool retains under dastardly tactics

I also predict (or hope to god, rather) that CM Punk has some kind of important promo regarding his straight-edge army.

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