Tuesday, December 15, 2009



I wrote stuff down as the show went on, but I'll just separate it into what I did and didn't like just so it's not an assault of text on the eyes.


- Dennis Miller failing. Nobody knows what incontinent means. Maybe it's a title.

- Oh boy. K Kwik just forgot the shit out of his lines.

- Ever so slowly planting the Jericho vs. Big Show seeds. They do have really great chemistry.

- Christian is the most believable face on the roster.


- Holy crap Evan Bourne in a segment not featuring Hornswoggle - do my eyes deceive me?!? WHOA DOUBLE DIVE KOFI AND BOURNE --I THINK THURSDAY RAW THURSDAY HAS SEEPED BACK INSIDE OF ME

- Too bad Bourne took the pin, but it makes the most sense. I really hope that he can keep himself involved with Kofi and maybe get the same rub Kofi got from Punk when they teamed for that brief time.

- There can't be anyone more universally hated than Vickie Guerrero.

- Santino is never not funny holy poops.


- I really want to try and compile every guest host fuck up into one glorious montage of baffoonery.

- Holy hell. Shawn Michaels challenging the Undertaker gave me instant nipple erection and I don't care who knows it. That was really sweet.

- Bret Hart? I uh… really? Crazy if this was done to set something up.

- Jericho is hilarious. I'm into the DX/JeriShow segment and I don't give a hoot how many times Jericho is kicked off RAW.


- Khali and Kane teaming together after Kane viciously injured Khali to put him out of action (stretcher'd out no less)… is completely fucking stupid. I just hate when the plotholes are so goddamned big that you could drive a big gay DX tank through them.

- I feel for Dennis Miller… there can't be anything worse than bombing for three hours straight.

- What's weird about Sheamus is how they talk about how dominating he is… when he really hasn't defeated anyone of any importance. He beat Goldust and other jobbers on ECW. He retired Jamie Noble who hadn't appeared on TV for like ever. He beat Santino. He beat Cena when he fell through some furniture. If the angle was "can Sheamus prove himself after barely earning the title?" I would be more into it. Instead, it's "holy fack Sheamus is a crazy monster of domination who can stop him?!" and I curl up in a ball and cry.

- Punk wins a Slammy for retiring Jeff Hardy. AMAZING. WAIT WHAT?! COMMERCIAL?! YOU FOOLS! Whoa okay we're back and he's still going to talk. Sweetness. No one is better than Punk on the mic. Bahaha… Charasmatic Enabler. I forgot about that.

- John Cena is the most clean cut super babyface in the history of wrestling. He comes out wearing a bright orange t-shirt that says "never give up" and his signature taunt is the "A-Okay!" sign.

- I sadly already know Cena wins this since I tuned into the replay while the live feed was just finishing up.

- Holy FUCK was that horseshit. As I was typing the above, thinking the match was just getting started, Cena taps Punk. BAHAHAH THE GIRL CRYING CHANTING CENA. Oh man… but seriously, wish I coulda timed that match. Right after Punk put himself over so hard talking about winning the World Title twice, retiring Jeff Hardy and winning MITB twice… Cena taps him in like two minutes tops. Might even be less.

- To add to the part about Cena being 100% clean cut babyface… he also apologizes to everyone for losing. Sowwy fans.

- Triple H mentions the winner's prize money?! I… WHAT.

So, you may have noticed that there are about as many things under the "liked" category as the "didn't like"... but it's not quite accurate. Most of the things under I liked were things like Dennis Miller fucking up, or unintentionally funny shit happening that makes me laugh. This show overall was a rough three hours to get through, and I literally fell asleep watching it.

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