Wednesday, April 28, 2010

RAW REVIEW: THE 2010 WWE DRAFT (AND THE SUPPLEMENTAL DRAFT, BECAUSE I TAKE MY VITAMINS)

Mmmm. Supplements. Let's get down to some seriously belated business. This will be in three main and hopefully not too boringly-long parts - the show itself, the Draft, and the Supplemental Draft.

THE SHOW
LIKED: HART DYNASTY, JERICHO/CHRISTIAN, EDGE BACK IN FAMILIAR TERRITORY (ESSENTIALLY - CANADIANS!)
DIDN'T LIKE: GUEST HOST JOHN CENA :(
Photo - WWE.com

LIKE
- Kicking off the show with the big Hart Dynasty title win. Holy Rick Moranis was this crowd on fire. I couldn't get over it. They LOVE them some Harts. From beginning to end, this was a masterpiece. From the promo beforehand with Miz playing off the crowd, to Bret's interruption, to the DH Smith stalling suplex with Tyson checking an invisible watch (AMAZING), all the way to the STELLAR finish with Bret shoving Miz's feet off the ropes (and his hat off of his own head - oopsie!), Miz's incredulous reaction, Tyson Kidd's crowd-popping somersault plancha from the apron to a Bret-seeking Big Show, the springboard Hart Attack, the fired-up reaction from DH and Tyson and finally, the glorious Sharpshooter on Miz (and his "I can't tell if I'm in the Sharpshooter of if I'm being electrocuted"-selling) and how the crowd popped harder for that Sharpshooter than they did for the 13-years-in-the-making Sharpshooter on Vince McMahon. I could write forever about this match. We marked out like we were eleven in our mom's basement watching this. Great way to set the mood for a very fun show. My bad for the wall of text.
- And I also forgot to mention how much I love watching Bret and Nattie on the outside together. This is the best thing going not named CM Punk. If I get to see some kind of Straight Edge Society/Hart Dynasty Tag Title Feud in the future, I'll tongue kiss my TV.
- Big Show's real life punch to Miz. That was real right guys? Looked real. Unlike UFC. Which is fake.
- Jack Swagger having a degree in finanth.
- Kelly Kelly's smiling and waving followed by a cut to Layla and Michelle McCool challenging Kelly to get in the ring with them, followed by a frequent cuts back to Kelly still smiling and waving.
- Punk/Bourne. It's too bad these two couldn't have ended up on the same show somehow. They could develop a great series of matches, even if it's not a main feud of any kind. Between Evan Bourne's Tekken-like leaping knee strikes and Punk's not-so-video-game-like kicks, they could definitely tear down a house or ten.
- Randy Orton's elaborately detailed threat to Sheamus, which the crowd responded to like wildfire.
- John Cena's hilarious fashion style. Jean shorts, sweatbands, running shoes without socks, tight-fitting baseball cap, Championship belt fastened OVER the t-shirt (thus bunching it up comically at the back and poofing it out everywhere else like he's Jerry Seinfeld (and not the "puffy shirt" - just a regular Jerry Seinfeld shirt)), all in matching fluorescent orange. Try and describe this exact outfit to a friend and also mention that this dude is the biggest name in pro wrestling, and your friend will laugh in your face. In conclusion, this makes me somehow love John Cena for being such a nerd.
- DiBiase and Mysterio making the battle royale feel more special at the end then it probably even needed to be. Bonus points for Santino hilarity. And a quick side note: I love DiBiase snatching up Marufuji's now-you-see-me-now-you-don't rope running clothesline.
- Jericho/Christian. Fantastic from bell to bell. I was hoping we'd get to see more of them together on Smackdown, but once the night was through, so was this idea.
- Swagger/Morrison - it was nice to see Swagger even the score with Morrison. More on this in the Draft portion of the review.
- Ted DiBiase attempting to recruit R-Truth as his own personal Virgil, which earned himself a smack in the mouth, and a busted-gut from me laughing so hard. Really hope Ted brings in the Fortunate Sons, then we'd have some super solid stables for the first time in a long time, between them, the Harts and the SES.
- Dolph Ziggler choking out Hornswoggle in way that made for a more convincing death than R-Truth being blown-up a week ago.
- Batista's scary promo. I didn't even expect to see him on the show and I think they knew that most people (or at least some) felt the same way, which made his interruption, his psycho-pissed promo and his shocking win all that much more awesome.
- Edge's attack on Orton, potentially u-turning him right back to heel to start a Rated-RKO feud that could feel like a tweener vs. tweener feud, which would light this summer on fire, if followed through on in a good way (which I hope it will).

DIDN'T LIKE
- The apparent ShoMiz split. The punch was truly AWWWESOME and all, but I loved these two as a team, and really thought they still had a lot left to offer. Maybe they're not done for good, but after that definitive "I think we should see other people" right hand KO and Big Show's goofy interaction with Teddy Long, it really seems like Big Show is off to SD! as a face. Only time will tell.
- The Divas' tag match. Didn't totally hate it or anything, it just didn't measure up to the rest of the wrestling on the show.
- No Wade Barrett. :(
- Wayne Brady bringing me back to reality. Not every week can be without a goofy guest host.
- Actually, now that I mention it - same goes for this week's show! We were promised no goofy guest host, and we still got a goofy guest host... John Cena. He even cracked-wise about the whole guest host concept, then proceeded to be one for the rest of the night. All we were missing was a "Word Life: The John Cena Story" DVD plug. Actually, WE DID get a plug for the Army featuring John Cena! Holy crap.
- Hornswoggle chucking things at Dolph Ziggler and not getting disqualified. This is so nit-picky, but it's just another case of the WWE writing a segment that doesn't fit the rules of wrestling, just so they can get the result they want, even though they could've found another way AND uphold the rules of the ring. I don't want to go off on a tangent or anything here, but this happened last year sometime: In a match against Evan Bourne, The Miz was on the outside flapping his gums at Swagger, and the count on the outside was at like 7. Evan Bourne dove to the outside, taking Miz out - so the count should be reset, right? Nope. Bourne slid back in, the count continued, Bourne wins by countout. Couldn't they have found a way to finish that match, or this Ziggler/Hornswoggle match that had the same result, but didn't ignore established rules? I am such a nit-picking son of a gun, but I can't help it. *pushes up glasses on nose*
- Most of the main event. It was alright, but until the finish with Edge running in, I wasn't super into it. Maybe it was the wear and tear of three hours and change of WWE in a row, plus the three hours of Extreme Rules the night before.

Part two, the Draft recap, will be coming tomorrow (or later today, since it's 2:33 a.m. and I'm still writing about wrestling in my sweatpants. I promise I will get a life someday, dad. I promise).

Tuesday, April 27, 2010

TNA TOP 10 CONTENDER RANKING SYSTEM - FEAT. THE IWC!

I find it hilarious that Eric Bischoff trashed the IWC publicly and now he's the guy responsible for bringing in the new Top Ten Contenders system, where the IWC shows up in hoards to vote for Indy-favourite and current poll leader Nigel McGuinness to fight for the World Title.

Place your vote (or multiple votes, so it seems), here.

Also, just quickly, I wonder how much bullshit this voting system is, considering all of the other "factors" that are involved in this ranking system. In addition to the fan vote, these weighted factors include individual wrestler career performance (aka no jobbers), win/loss record (aka you can vote for whoever and we can make them lose if we want), and opinions from Bischoff, Hogan and Dixie Carter (aka time will tell how much they pay attention to the fans).

WWE EXTREME RULES REVIEW: A WRESTLING PAY-PER-VIEW

If you did not like this PPV, I firmly believe you've been seriously conditioned by the WWE's recent penchant for events that feature random surprises and dudes winning matches they weren't advertised as being in... so you expect zaniness, get great wrestling instead, and feel disappointed. Fools!

EXTREME RULES
LIKED: WRESTLING!
DIDN'T LIKE: DUCT TAPE :(
Photo - WWE.com

In fact, I really don't need to do a full review for this. The wrestling was great, Rey/Punk had me hook, line and sinker for the whole thing (thinking that Punk was going to lose), until I finally realized the awesomeness of their feud (well, I always knew how awesome it was, but I finally got it). Rey beat Punk when the only stip was Rey joining the SES. Punk beat Rey when the only stip was Punk shaving his head. Now they need a rubber match with both stipulations in play. Awesome.

Edge/Jericho was fantastic and ended with a vicious beatdown that stays in line with Edge's character, especially following last night's RAW when he attacked Orton. The springboard Codebreaker was badass, as was Jericho hanging on the outside of the cage with his wrists tangled up in the steel supports of the cage.

Triple H/Sheamus was totally surprising and had the crowd the whole way through. Having Sheamus attack Triple H right at the start of the PPV was fantastic, as it led to Triple H selling the shit out of his arm for the entire match.

I could go on and on (Orton/Swagger was awesome with Swagger going over squeaky clean, Tag Gauntlet was fun and the Hart Dynasty are over the fucking moon, Cena/Batista delivered some serious table spots and got more exciting as the match went on), but I think I've made my point. This PPV was all about the wrestling.

The only real sour points for me were the following:

The Divas' match was good, but I just wasn't digging the whole makeup crap. It was weird seeing two totally talented and tough female wrestlers in wrestling gear suddenly bringing campy, sexist shit into their match. It made a ton of sense for the Good Housekeeping match, because that was the story. But this just seemed a little silly. I would've liked it more if it was straight up "loser gets a makeover from their opponent" to rectify what happened to Beth on Smackdown. Woulda made more sense to me, and probably would've got a big pop. Ah well.

And the main event. I really liked most of it. The start was pretty shaky for me, but then they finally caught their stride and everything picked up. But what really felt weird was the finish (which I'm sure everyone else has been talking about).

It's just bizarre that John Cena needed to find a loophole in the rules of the match to beat Batista, by taping him to the ring post. In fact, I'm not even sure it IS a loophole, since the rule states that you win when your opponent "cannot ANSWER the count of ten." The referee could've definitely used discretion and been like... well... he can answer the count, so the match should technically continue.

But overall, even with the questionable finish, I enjoyed the match and the pay-per-view the whole way through.

I apologize for this review being pretty tame. I've been sick today. That's no excuse though. The Miz would reprimand me if he heard me say that.

WWE PPV PREDICTION GAME: EXTREME RULES - RESULTS!

In our first event of the year-long series, we have a TIE.

EXTREME RULES (EVENT #1)
PREDICTION RESULTS

T1. Canadian Vampire (28 pts.) [PERFECT]
T1. French (28 pts.) [PERFECT]
T1. TOH (28 pts.) [PERFECT]
4. Monkey Man (27 pts.)
T5. Kastrada (26 pts.)
T5. Masa (26 pts.)
T5. PSO CheZi (26 pts.)
8. SETUP DISK (23 pts.)
9. SSJ Storm (22 pts.)
T10. pizzabodyslam (21 pts.)
T10. Heartless (21 pts.)
T12. TH - The Wrestling Blog (20 pts.)
T12. Cory Chaos (20 pts.)
T12. Arn Anderson (20 pts.)
15. Steve - Burning Spirit (19 pts.)
16. Mike - Next World Champ (18 pts.)
17. TheTazDevil (14 pts.)
18. TCU (10 pts.)

These points will carry over to every other event. If you missed making predictions for Extreme Rules, you can still join in at Over The Limit, or any other event and your points will still carry over.

Over The Limit airs May 23rd, 2010, so look for the next Prediction Game Post around then.

Sunday, April 25, 2010

WWE PPV PREDICTION GAME: EXTREME RULES STATS

Here is what everyone is thinking for tonight's PPV, which begins in just a few hours:

Only 43% think CM Punk will have his head shaved tonight.

An overwhelming 93% (all but one lonely fella) predict that Edge will defeat Chris Jericho tonight inside a steel cage.

71% believe that Jack Swagger will rectify his questionable booking as champion by defeating Randy Orton tonight.

Only 2 out of 14 people have learned that you never bet against THE DESTROYER (I am not one of them).

The recent split-up between Cryme Tyme has almost everyone split: 43% are for JTG and 57% are for Shad.

Michelle McCool's chances of retaining her Women's Title: 29%

And LITERALLY EVERYONE is banking on John Cena to be the Last Man Standing. Well, I wonder why...

You can STILL make your picks for Extreme Rules and get in on the year-long PPV Prediction Game (it will definitely help in the long run if you get in on the first event), by posting your picks HERE. Or just right below. Either way.

Tonight is going to be EXTREME.

LATE NIGHT REBLOG: KITTENS AND BABIES

A while back, I mentioned I would be reblogging anything cool I found on the tumblr feeds I added to the sidebar, and here's me following through on that.

These all come from Fuck Yeah WWE! and mostly feature WWE Superstars with kittens and babies. The last one is from Speechless Superstars, and is just kind of a cool John Cena picture (am I a twelve year old girl?!).












Saturday, April 24, 2010

ATTN: TYLER BLACK HATERZ


I have never been shy about my hate for Tyler Black haters (I'm a Tyler Black hater hater!), but as of late, the hate has died down a bit (and rightfully so). Tyler has put on some incredible matches as of late, winning and defending his ROH World Title on iPPV.

But if there are any of you still out there, here is what I propose for you:

Go fuck yourself.

Jokes! Seriously though, I suggest you check out his blog/formspring/twitter/official website/etc.

I've always been a Tyler Black fan, but reading his blog definitely gave me a better look at what he's actually like. He says some funny shit, makes fun of himself, and he talks to his fans, which is always cool.

Examples:

From his blog:
-Songs I am liking right now: "Kids in Love" by Mayday Parade, "Soul Sister" by Train, "Live Like You're Dying" by Kris Allen, "Starting Over" by Killswitch Engage, and as much as it pains me to say this because I thoroughly hate her guts "Bad Romance" by Lady Gaga. I hate myself.

From his blog, re: the new ROH World Title:
The belt is actually gold, which is great because now I can refer to it as such in promos without looking like a dummy.

From his Formspring:

So I was just wondering.. how big is your weiner?

Well actually I have a yorkie. And he's big. A fat boy at about 7 pounds.


And finally, from his Twitter, in response to Jimmy Jacobs posting this picture:



Oh man I miss that hat! And those days...I was probably 17 years old. Shoulda been out chasing


I just think that the people who trash him need to stop thinking about Gabe's Book of Secrets (I've never seen it) and what was "s'poseda happen!!!!1" (to be squealed aloud in nerd rage), and just start watching his matches as the exciting as hell wrestler and seemingly legitimately cool guy he is.

I really hope as his young career progresses (remember, he's only 23 - two months older than me) that his personality starts blending with his wrestling persona more, and we get a more natural Tyler Black in promos and stuff.

In other Tyler Black news, he'll be defending his ROH World Title tonight in Chicago against Chris Hero in the main event of a completely stacked card. Check it:

MAIN EVENT #1 - ROH WORLD TITLE MATCH
Champion Tyler Black
VS.
Challenger, ROH World Tag Team Champion "That Young Knockout Kid" Chris Hero
MAIN EVENT #2 - COME-AS-YOU-ARE STREET FIGHT
Colt Cabana & El Generico
VS.
Steve Corino & Kevin Steen
PICK 6 CHALLENGE MATCH
(1) Roderick Strong VS. (4) Davey Richards
TAG TEAM CHALLENGE
The Briscoe Brothers VS. Austin Aries & Kenny King
SPECIAL ATTRACTION
ROH World TV Champion Eddie Edwards VS. The Metal Master
FINAL COUNTDOWN TOUR: CHICAGO REMATCH
Petey Williams VS. "Addicted To Love" Rhett Titus
TAG TEAM ACTION
The House of Truth VS. Erick Stevens & Shawn Daivari
PLUS
"Skullkrusher" Rasche Brown, The Dark City Fight Club & "New Horror" Sami Callihan