SINCE I'VE BEEN GONE V - WTF THOUGHT I WAS DEAD LOL EDITION

Hello anyone who has stuck with me despite my sporadic, lengthy and unexplained disappearances. If you continue to read my blog (or Tumblr or Twitter or anything I do on Fair To Flair) even after I abandon it for weeks upon weeks of International super-benders, you are my hero and I thank you. But, I can't promise it won't happen again. I could up and leave at anytime. I'm like your step dad. Unless if you have a step dad that really does leave you all the time. In that case, I'm something less offensive. Because I'd never really leave you! I love you! C'mon, let's go have a catch.

But then after that I gotta go out for smokes (don't wait up). Love you!

SINCE I'VE BEEN GONE

I CAN BREATHE FOR THE FIRST TIME WHAT'S HAPPENED IN THE WORLD OF WRESTLING

Photo - WWE.com

During my leave of absence (fifth one, if I counted correctly), as per usual, something HUGE happened and I missed it. For once can't nothing happen while I'm gone? Just send Melina out there to make faces for a few hours, no one will notice a difference. WHAT DO YOU MEAN SHE'S FIRED?

While I try to accept this tragic loss, let's recap what I missed on my four previous wrestling-less sabbaticals:

SIBG 1: Daniel Bryan vs. Dolph Ziggler, MOTY at Bragging Rights

SIBG 2: The Miz cashes in, wins WWE Title

SIBG 3: Matt Hardy gets dreadlocks

SIBG 4: WrestleMania XXVII

SIBG 5: The biggest event of the summer, not without controversy or John Cena putting it all out there for the WWE Universe...

SUMMERSLAM 2011 JOHN CENA EXPOSES SELF ON TWITTER

WE CAN ALL SEE YOU NOW EW

Photo - John Cena's outbox of shame

Here's the part where I, a grown-up man (as grown-up as a wrestling fan on the Internet can be), talk about John Cena's penis (which conveniently rhymes; I expect him to use it in one of his rapping songs [he still does rap songs, right?]). Well, not really his penis. More like his penis region.

For those who don't know (and if you don't know, it's probably a testament to your character as a citizen of the world), John Cena tweeted a very sexualized picture of himself (uh, on purpose). It depicts him completely naked in the mirror, with the photo cutting off just before U Can't See his penis.

I'm not going to call this appalling or offensive or whatever, but I will give you my first, immediate thought:

THIS IS FUCKING WEIRD.

It literally gave me the "heebie jeebies" (eye cancer).

I just found it so bizarre, ESPECIALLY because it came in a string of tweets where he was answering fans' questions, some of which were asking about a future heel turn. He responded in classic John Cena form by saying, essentially "I am me. I do what I do, and you decide my fate" blah blah blah, where he says he's always the same and it's up to the fans whether they like him or not. Then he tweets a picture of his cock. HE'S GONE FULL HEEL! OR AT LEAST HALF-CHUB HEEL.

The weirdest part about it is how WWE TV and John Cena himself have made a point of letting us know that children love John Cena. Obviously women love Cena too, but it's the children that Cena has literally (literally literally!) defended on television. He's given speeches about how proud he is to be a hero to children and how if kids like him it shouldn't be a detriment to him as a man. This all happened recently. He's a saviour to Little Jimmies everywhere, and maybe he wanted to show us his Little Jimmy I DON'T KNOW. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING.

Let me put it this way. Had Shawn Michaels tweeted a picture of his penis region (or say, posed in Playgirl), I would be totally on board, because he is called a Sexy Boy; I know what I'm getting into. But if John Cena tweets a picture of his SuperDick, I might go, "hey, um, what the FUCK?!"

I'm trying to imagine what it would be like if Hulk Hogan or Steve Austin tweeted a sexualized naked picture of themselves to their fans, but my brain won't allow me to ruin all of wrestling for myself, so that's not happening. And it's one thing if it was a picture (like this one, or this one) that was dug up and posted on the internet by rabid fans. This was tweeted straight from the SuperHorse's fingertips.

Very strange and out of character both in and out of character.

Also very veiny.

The end.

SUMMERSLAM 2011

THE SECOND BIGGEST EVENT OF THE SUMMER

Photo - WWE.com

While I would love to write several paragraphs about Sheamus vs. Mark Henry or John Cena vs. CM Punk or Kelly Kelly impressing the shit out of everybody, I've already wasted about 90,000 words on John Cena's upper taint. So, instead, I'll point you in the direction of some fantastic reviews of the show, and then you can come back here to read about the most important figures in pro wrestling today, the Ultimate Warrior and Matt Hardy.

THE BEST AND WORST OF SUMMERSLAM 2011 BY BRANDON STROUD (WITH LEATHER)

I rep Brandon Stroud on this blog just a little bit less than Matt Hardy, but it's still an embarrassing amount. Go read his reviews. Derrick Bateman reads them. Do it for Derrick Bateman. Do it for Chicks and America. Do it for Maxine. That last part is for people who follow NXT, which may or may not include Derrick Bateman or Brandon Stroud or myself even.

SUMMERSLAM 2011 BY RAZOR (FAIR TO FLAIR, KICK-OUT!! WRESTLING)

In addition to abandoning this blog for several weeks, I also went missing from Fair To Flair. Thankfully, fellow FTF contributor Razor was there to make fun of WWE Cock Rock and Cee Lo Green, as well as give a very positive and fair (to flair) review.

HOW TO MAKE SOME FANS HAPPY, HOW TO MAKE SOME FANS UPSET BY K. SAWYER PAUL (FAIR TO FLAIR, INTERNATIONAL OBJECT)

In addition to changing gimmicks at blinding speed, K. Sawyer Paul has also provided the most succinct review of SummerSlam in two clever posts. He's also been taking over the sidebar of Fair To Flair with exactly what he promised - the best wrestling stories on the Internet. I can wholeheartedly say that if The Dirtsheets was a VHS tape of wrestling news, I'd be taping over that shit with Int'l Object even if I wasn't a part of FTF.

THE MASKED MAN (GRANTLAND, UH, TWITTER)

He doesn't have an article on SummerSlam, but his thoughts on Twitter are absolutely worth scrolling through. The Masked Man has brought wrestling writing to mainstream sports blogs like Deadspin, as well as Grantland, where he writes about wrestling alongside the likes of Chuck Klosterman and Bill Simmons. He also gives roommate reactions on Twitter, which provides such gems of insight as "He looks like a date rapist (roommate on The Miz)".

EDIT: Grantland just posted The Masked Man's SummerSlam article, Back to Unreality.

SEVERAL SUMMERSLAM POSTS! BY TOM HOLZERMAN (FAIR TO FLAIR, THE WRESTLING BLOG)

I'd be hard-pressed not to mention my blogging Brosa Mendes who wrote a review of SummerSlam, as well as individual posts about Sheamus/Mark Henry, Kelly Kelly and Commercials on PPV. If you want to read about SummerSlam, TH has every angle covered.

ULTIMATE WARRIOR

SMOKING ASS, OR SOMETHING? I DON'T KNOW. SOMETHING ABOUT A GENIUS REAPER.

I think he showed up with a YouTube account to remind us that Matt Hardy eating grapes and tazing women isn't enough to out-crazy the Ultimate Warrior. Jesus, even John Cena is out-crazying Matt Hardy! What happened Matt? Get on YouTube and show us what you're made of already! I do appreciate you burning your garbage and blowing up aerosol cans or getting bumshit hammered or giving cooking lessons to nobody, but do you think that's enough to keep up with the Ultimate Warrior swearing at a fictional lazy person? Or John Cena getting as naked and veiny as he possibly can and tweeting a picture of himself? NO. NO MATT. NO.

You need to pull yourself up by the cargo pant pockets and prove just who really is the craziest fucking idiot on the Internet. Grab your flipcam, kiss your brother, throw Shannon Moore into a pile of syringes, I don't care. Just be the best idiot you can be. I believe in you.

RING OF HONOR + PRO WRESTLING GUERRILLA

TV TAPINGS, DBD IX, STEEN VS. FINLAY

Photo - ROHWrestling.com

ROH taped their first show for the Sinclair Broadcasting Group this past weekend. I didn't read spoilers, since I will be able to watch the show on my actual TV (September 24th), which makes me happy. Okay, I did read one spoiler, but it had nothing to do with match outcomes, so that's fine.

Ring Of Honor also announced the first match for Death Before Dishonor IX in New York this September, which will feature Roderick Strong and Eddie Edwards in a "Ringmaster Challenge" match, that has nothing to do with both guys getting managed by Ted DiBiase and wearing white boots. It's a Two Out of Three Falls match where the first fall can only be won by pinfall, the second fall can only be won by submission, and the third fall, if necessary (it'll be necessary), will be a 15 minute Iron Man match. This will be the kind of match for fans with workrate boners, and they're letting you know ahead of time.

PWG's 2011 Battle of Los Angeles is happening this Saturday, with Kevin Steen vs. Fit FUCKING Finlay as the most notable match on the card. I don't think there's anything left to say. This is going to be the realest shit ever forever hyperbole ever.

HULK HOGAN

REGRETS INVESTING IN MEATBALL MACHINE

Thank you dirtsheets for providing me with this headline, and the endless laughter. You will never top this. Never.

...

That is all.

I'M BACK! IT FEELS LIKE I'VE BEEN AWAKENED FROM A COMA!

Nothing like that has happened in wrestling lately, has it? Nah, that'd be crazy!

SINCE I'VE BEEN GONE

I CAN BREATHE FOR THE FIRST TIME WHAT HAPPENED IN THE WORLD OF WRESTLING

Photo - Stephanie McMahon's limbic system

Well, it's been a solid month, but I'm back. First thing I should probably get to - the WWE PPV Prediction Game. I totally dropped the ball on that one, not once, but twice. Travelling and keeping up with things like that are certainly not easy, but hopefully I'll have my shit in order for Survivor Series. If I don't, I give you permission to blind me with an urn that may or may not steal my soul and/or powers.

DANIEL BRYAN VS. DOLPH ZIGGLER

BRAGGING RIGHTS, RAW, SMACKDOWN

Photo - WWE.com

You don't need me to tell you how great this was several weeks after the fact, because you already know. Bryan Danielson is currently filling a Matt Hardy-sized void (he's still fat right? I've been gone for a while) in the WWE by putting on the kind of wrestling matches you don't see in this wrestling company. The kind of wrestling matches you see in this wrestling company have shoulder offense and David Otunga slow motion scoop slams. This match didn't have any of that! It had fans reacting and responding to legitimate wrestling moves and holds. For a match that had maybe a week of build, it tore the house down by telling a story in the ring.

I truly feel like this match will be the Dynamite Kid/Tiger Mask equivalent when we look back on this time and go "WOW, that was going on while I was watching John Cena sell an insult for three and a half minutes?!"

UNDERTAKER AND KANE

PUSHING THE LIMITS OF SANITY (UNTIL VINCE MCMAHON'S DREAM COMA ON RAW)

Photo - WWE.com

This feud bounced back and forth between being completely un-paul-bearable (lol?) to being legit viral video worthy. I can't tell if I loved it or hated it. The Paul Bearer promo that looked like it was edited by Tim Heidecker where he challenged Undertaker to a Buried Alive match was accidental comedy GOLD. But then all of the whiffed punches and punch-drunk selling that came in between the voodoo lightning bolts and arena-climbing took up so much time that I think I'll stick this in the "hated it" column. And that's hard for me to do, because so much of this was so camp and cheesy that it was fun to watch when you're blind drunk.

RING OF HONOR NEWS

SURVIVAL OF THE FITTEST, FINAL BATTLE, TYLER/DAVEY

Incredible photo - Scott Finkelstein's Get Lost Photography

We're heading into yet another exciting couple of months for ROH, and I'll be seeing some of it live. I'll be hitting up both events next weekend - Survival of the Fittest in Michigan and the Daniels/Strong title match in Toronto, both of which I'm vibrating with anticipation for. Yep. Vibrating. I'll have some kind of preview up for those shows sometime soon.

While I was gone, a few awesome things happened, and one not so awesome thing happened. The not so awesome thing would be ROHBrazil's YouTube channel getting suspended. I was so psyched to throw on Tyler/Davey from a couple weeks ago and have a shouting match with my laptop (in excitement), but that didn't happen, DID IT?!

The awesome things, however, are these two badass hype videos. One is for the final encounter (or battle, I guess would be a better word) between Kevin Steen and El Generico at Final Battle - mask vs. career:

The other video is more of a music video. It's taken from Glory By Honor where the Kings of Wrestling had their theme music performed live by Cody B. Ware:

MATT HARDY RELEASED

CORE GROUP TO TNA?

Photo - MATTHARDYBRAND

There's nothing like leaving for a month and coming back to enough Matt Hardy YouTube videos to fill every pocket of your designer cargo pants. My personal favourite has to be this one, just for how it starts. I won't say how it starts since it caught me off guard and I spit up on my laptop in hysterics.

Now the question is, where does Matt go from here? Well, he wasted no time in telling us. After he assured us that he's doing great, he's better than ever. He's awesome. Never felt better - he's great guys! So great, so happy. So happy and great to be released - glad even! Guys, I'm fine. I love it. Fine guys. Never felt better, look at me. So happy. I'm fine. Fine. Great.

After he did that, he dropped some very subtle hints (watch carefully, you might miss the hints!) about where he may end up.

EDIT: I don't think I surveyed the situation properly to find my actual favourite Matt Hardy YouTube entry that went up while I was gone. Because I just watched this one. To quickly summarize, it begins with him in the shower and ends with him holding a gun over a bed full of money. And there's a giant broadsword. You're welcome.

ALSO THIS HAPPENED

HULK HOGAN RAPSTAR COMMERCIAL, FEATURING BROOKE HOGAN AND THE THING THAT MADE BROOKE HOGAN

Video courtesy of Kotaku - click image to watch

No, not Jimmy Hart - Hulk Hogan's genitalia! What a strange commercial. This, in addition to his "full-blown evil on your ass/draw money/start shootin'/fake ass wrestlin'" twitvid, and in addition to all of the insanity floating around TNA about concussions and brutal chairshots and "THEY" being these guys, goes to show that I haven't missed a thing in TNA in the last month. Business as usual.

That's definitely not all that happened this month. Smackdown! continued to produce the best mainstream wrestling show going, highlighted by a PPV-headlining-worthy main event contest between Alberto del Rio and Rey Mysterio. Evan Bourne and CM Punk were both injured, thus making RAW about 500% less watchable over the next few months. Lita ruined a game of diva-twister, Mark Henry revealed he needs to write "R" and "L" on each of his hands, Johnny Knoxville pulled some pranks, Undertaker was murdered and Freddie Prinze, Jr. is back with WWE as the resident medical doctor, specializing in Stephanie McMahon's fucked up dreams.

I love pro wrestling.

WOOPACHE - VIA COLT CABANA'S "ART OF WRESTLING" PODCAST

The latest edition of Colt Cabana's podcast (which I link in the sidebar - and right here in these very parenthesis) features the best pro wrestling/Sugarhill Gang mash-up I've ever heard! I was cracking up at this, and thought it'd be a good thing to share. It also opened up a whole new world of wrestling mash-ups that I didn't know existed. Including this Hulk Hogan/Headbangers/Apple Pie mash-up that defies description.

But first, here's Woopache:

Subscribe to Colt Cabana's "Art of Wrestling" podcast at WeLoveColt.com - and you can satisfy all of your Colt Cabana needs at ColtMerch.com

WHY THIS TNA/HOGAN/ TWITTER FIASCO IS A WORK

If you don't know what I'm talking about, head over to Cageside Seats who have a pretty thorough recap.

WHO IS @TNANONYMOUS?

IT'S TNA-A-WORKING-US!

Photo - TNAWrestling.com

Pun - me. sorry.

I can't be the first one to say this and truly believe it, but if I am, then U HERD IT HERE FIRSTTT.

First of all, I just don't fucking believe it. I don't believe that Eric Bischoff and Hogan's bestest bud Bubba the Love Sponge would just start declaring that this account is real, for no reason. Literally. No reason. What reason could Bischoff or Bubba have been given to follow this account, instead of any of the other countless fake Hogan accounts that pop up? None.

Unless if the reason was for a lot of people to follow the fake account so everyone could see the bogus tweets that were about to happen, thus putting this work into motion.

Hogan didn't say anything about it to E and BTLS, obviously, and these dudes are closer than brothers, brother! Why would they jump all over this without consulting the Hulkster? And while I do find Bubba to be exceptionally stupid, I don't find him or Bisch stupid enough to just declare a completely and obviously fake Hogan account as real and tell the world to follow it.

Plus, why the fuck would Bubba tweet about a meeting with Hogan, and tweet TO Hogan about the meeting they just had WHEN THEY WERE JUST THERE TOGETHER. Surely Bubba would've said to Hogan, who was allegedly right beside him, "hey, ur on twitter now right? i'ma tweet u. bubba." and Hogan would say, "no i am not on a twitter whats a twitter, jack"

Not only that, but TNA has already had this account overturned AND are promoting Hogan joining Twitter on Impact. So, they're taking this story and putting it on TV already. And I'm pretty sure it takes a little longer to take control of a fake account. WWE try to get rid of fakes for fucking weeks, if not longer, and they're WWE. The speed of this was insane, and seemed like it was done this way to create an intentional buzz.

Which brings me to my other reason. TNA love this whole "buzz for the wrong reason" approach. Whether it's bringing Hogan's fat friends into TNA, or putting ECW wrestlers' interests above the company's, or orchestrating a phony Twitter account story to get them buzz on the dirtsheets for their next episode, they love this stuff. It also screams of Eric Bischoff and how he loves working the internet for fun.

This idea definitely sounds like it's leading to a "WHO IS THE TNANONYMOUS DISGRUNTLED WRESTLER?!?!" It sounds like a storyline that TNA would do, because they, like WCW did, loves the "who's side is he on?!" "who's the mystery masked man?!" "but why did he do it?!" "who is the disgruntled wrestler on Twitter?!?lol?" bullshit-whodunnit type of angles that essentially are just done because they don't know how to tell a story without being like "but there will be surprises, promise!" Which is also bullshit, because advertising surprises defeats the whole goddamn purpose (but that's a whole other rant).

Here's what I am guessing will happen:

Hogan shows up on Impact, says some "dudes" and "brothers," maybe he addresses a current storyline or whatever, but then eventually he explains that he's joining Twitter. He makes an inside joke/crack at the whole debacle that went on yesterday, and that's about it.

But eventually, be it the next show, or a little ways down the road, the whole "disgruntled employee" thing starts playing out on the show. People start wondering who it is, wrestlers keep getting "misused" and "screwed" and there is a TNA originals V. brass storyline that ultimately goes nowhere.

I really do think this is all a work. Maybe even some of the things we've been reading online have been embellished or even worked as well (Joe yelling at Russo, Styles complaining about dropping the belt, etc.). This TNAnonymous guy is essentially outlining a feud on Twitter, saying he'll reveal his identity in October when his contract is up, along with 14 other upset wrestlers' contracts. Hmm… so he begins with an initial conflict (fake Twitter fiasco), challenges an opponent (Hogan, Dixie, Bischoff), sets a date for this to be resolved (October) with a stipulation (loser leaves TNA).

...

Sounds like a storyline to me!

And I also don't believe the hilarity that a real human TNA wrestler actually thought the best way to go about solving his issues in the workplace was to create a fake Hulk Hogan account on Twitter and go fucking postal with it. Not only that, but he managed to convince Hogan's closest friends that it was legit.

It's a work. It's hilarious how quickly the wrestling media bit on this one. But I will admit, done the right way, working people on Twitter would be AMAZING. But this just isn't subtle at all.

Also, Bound For Glory is in October. Worth mentioning. And apparently Hogan's contract expires in October. Holy jeepers is this a work.

I almost hate writing this and pointing it out, in case people are buying into it and getting excited. There's nothing worse than someone ruining the ending of a good book. Except TNA isn't a good book, it's more of a shitty remake of a bad movie you would sometimes watch but never really got into because the ring was too small and made a weird noise and Tony Schiavone was annoying.

If I'm wrong you have permission to post things like "lol" and "butthurt" and "U MAD" in the comments section.

The end!

GET READY FOR THE MONDAY/THURSDAY NIGHT WARS!!

Goliath def. David via submission

TNA TOP 10 CONTENDER RANKING SYSTEM - FEAT. THE IWC!

I find it hilarious that Eric Bischoff trashed the IWC publicly and now he's the guy responsible for bringing in the new Top Ten Contenders system, where the IWC shows up in hoards to vote for Indy-favourite and current poll leader Nigel McGuinness to fight for the World Title.

Place your vote (or multiple votes, so it seems), here.

Also, just quickly, I wonder how much bullshit this voting system is, considering all of the other "factors" that are involved in this ranking system. In addition to the fan vote, these weighted factors include individual wrestler career performance (aka no jobbers), win/loss record (aka you can vote for whoever and we can make them lose if we want), and opinions from Bischoff, Hogan and Dixie Carter (aka time will tell how much they pay attention to the fans).

I ALWAYS KNEW JEFF HARDY WAS A BURNOUT, BUT THIS IS RIDICULOUS!

I've been sitting here thinking of puns for about a half hour and that's the best I came up with.

Anyway, here's the fucking crazy video of Jeff Hardy blazing.

Okay I'll stop.

The sad thing is, I actually really like Jeff Hardy. I just can't resist making terrible jokes.

Apparently, according to Jeff Hardy's girlfriend's Twitter (which is a sentence that couldn't better reveal how much of a nerd I am), Jeff was burned pretty bad by the flame, enough to "blister & peel," which is pretty bad.

I wonder who's call it was to have Storm bring the fire? Probably not Hogan.

I'll say it again. Probably not Hogan.

FLIPPING BETWEEN RAW AND IMPACT: 03/08/10

This will likely be the new format for any Monday night wrestling review. Me and my pal Steve (hi steve) decided that the best course of action was this:

9:00 - Impact

9:15 - RAW

REST OF NIGHT - Flip between the two with a Justin TV stream on the go, letting us know what's going on during Impact.

In Canada we get RAW at a 15-minute time delay, so Impact will always get a lead-in with us. After that, it's fair game.

Now here's the problem, which will be fixed the next time this nerdy showdown of watching wrestling on a TV and a laptop simultaneously goes down. I don't remember exactly when we flipped back and forth, so the night ended with me wondering if Sting was with Batista or not. So the segment comparisons below might not be 100% accurate.

The best part about this whole deal to me isn't really about which show was better than the other, but more about piecing one good show together out of the two.

Our night had a lot of "oh, Divas tag match turns into POOF - X-Division three-way!" or "Brooke Hogan is crying to her dad turns into POOF - Evan Bourne's SSP!"

Here is how the competition shaped up for us, essentially (in terms of what we chose to watch instead of what):

MINDFREAK & THE JOHN CENA GAUNTLET VS. HOGAN & FLAIR GETTING JUICE THREE TIMES BETWEEN THEM (IN 2010)

THE BREAKDOWN

TNA Main Event tease def. Score RAW Preview RAW

TNA X-Division 3-Way def. Taker/HBK, Divas Tag RAW

RAW Criss Angel's eyeball def. Dixie Carter TNA

RAW Miz talkin' DREW Knockouts/Pope & Desmond TNA

RAW ShoMiz vs. Mo'Truth def. Commercials? TNA

TNA Sting/RVD def. Some tricks--sorry ILLUSIONS RAW

RAW Legacy Handicap Match def. The Banned (ha?) TNA

RAW Batista interview def. Young/Pac denim match TNA

TNA Army Lumberjack promo DREW HHH/Sheamus RAW

RAW Criss Angel squashing paper cups def. Tenay/Taz TNA

RAW Bourne/Regal def. Jarrett/Foley/Beer Money TNA

TNA No DQ Main Event def. Vince McMahon RAW

RAW Feats of Strength with John Cena def. Nothing TNA

And here are my favourite moments of the entire night...

GREATEST MOMENTS FROM MONDAY NIGHT

- Taz calling Hulk Hogan "Help Hogan"

- Evan Bourne filling the last MITB spot

- The X-Division Three-Way

- Shannon Moore getting a Title shot by applying the foolproof TNA strategy of staying off TV for months

- Jeff Hardy cleans house and let's us use our ImagInation for the Swanton Bomb!

- The absolute INSANITY I felt enter my mind as I watched the TNA main event. Just a hilariously scary thing to watch. Ric Flair looked like someone from my nightmares.

- Taker/HBK announced as NO DQ: Take bets now on how scary the Shawn Michaels table spot will be. I bet it will be at least an 11 on the DBMM.

- Jeremy Borash dumping champagne down Lacey Von Erich's cleavage.

- The pop for RVD.

- The endless beatdown of RVD.

- Dis N Dat point at a sign.

- Generation ME/MCMG announced for Destination X as an Ultimate X match. That match will almost certainly look like CGI it will be so goddamned crazy.

- Vince McMahon inventing rules for matches that have never existed before anyway.

- Batista's "all eyes on me" spotlight-cueing thumbs.

If this can just keep happening every week where I get thoroughly entertained by two wrestling shows, by flipping between the two... I will be greatly pleased.

And it appears that next week will be even crazier, somehow. RAW will have Michaels/Jericho, Show/Cena and HHH/Orton with Stone Cold Steve Austin as the host, who will likely monitor the Bret/Vince contract signing.

While TNA is boasting an insane tag team match pitting Jeff Hardy & Rob Van Dam against AJ Styles & Desmond Wolfe. That, plus Generation Me wrestling, according to Matt Jackson on Twitter, should make for some tough channel flipping.

It's WAY more exciting watching both at the same time/flipping channels than it is DVRing one and watching both one after the other. You just get so worn out by the end of it all. But two shows at once makes for a wild evening that makes you feel like you've been drinkin' and druggin' with reckless abandon.