Sunday, January 31, 2010

ROYAL RUMBLE: WHAT'S GON' HAPPEN?!

Here are the official odds from Vegas, Atlantic City Barrie:

ROYAL RUMBLE 2010
THE ODDS

John Cena wins the Royal Rumble Match (2:1)
Batista wins the Royal Rumble Match (2:1)
Cena AND Batista win the Royal Rumble Match (2:1)
Triple H wins the Royal Rumble Match (2:1)
Shawn Michaels wins the Royal Rumble Match (2:1)
Triple H AND HBK win the Royal Rumble Match (2:1)
Ahmed Johnson eliminates himself from the Royal Rumble Match (2:1)
Edge returns! (3:1)
Edge returns and reinjures himself! (3:1)
Rob Van Dam is a surprise entrant! (3:1)
Booker T is a surprise entrant! (3:1)
Booker T is a surprise entrant to zero reaction! (3:1)
Ahmed Johnson has one of those Goldust gold circles stuck to his back (3:1)
Sheamus squashes Randy Orton (10:1)
Sheamus squashes Randy Orton and adopts Ted and Cody as his own henchmodel BFFs (50:1)
Undertaker makes an appearance (10:1)
Undertaker uses his voodooo powers to beat Raymond Stereo (2:1)
Drew McIntyre speaks very quietly YET ANGRILY (2:1)
Vince McMahon and Bret Hart have a wild brawl through the crowd, finishing with a massive table spot (100:1)
Vince McMahon and Bret Hart speak (3:1)
Christian loses the ECW Title, only to enter himself in the Royal Rumble AND WIN! (inmydreams:1)
Bryan Danielson debuts to help CM Punk win the Royal Rumble (inmysmarkdreams:1)
The Hurricane wins the Royal Rumble by punching a woman over the top rope (5:1)
Michael Cole puts over Mark Henry as a legitimate threat to win the Rumble (2:1)
Michael Cole fake laughs (1:1)
Michael Cole gets a boner on-air after calling a Batista Bomb for the first time in months (1:1)
Michael Cole infuriates me to the point of self mutilation (1:1)
Michael Cole gets juice! (10:1)
Evan Bourne eliminates Triple H from the Royal Rumble (1000000:1)
Evan Bourne eliminates Triple H from the Royal Rumble and plants a wet one on Stephanie (1000000000:1)
Evan Bourne is eliminated by Triple H from the Royal Rumble (2:1)

I'm looking forward to the most fun live WWE PPV of the year!

Saturday, January 30, 2010

THANK GOD FOR SMACKDOWN!

That was the best "go home" show for a pay-per-view I've seen since the WWE last erased my wrestling memory.

There was literally not a single low point in the show for me. Even R-Truth vs. Jericho was spot on. I can't get over it. SD! has been far better than RAW for the last while now, but it still hasn't reached it's fever pitch like it did last summer. But tonight's show was a goddamn godsend.

The Royal Rumble doesn't really need a build on TV for people to buy it, but it's always nice to have one. There really wasn't much going into tonight's show, but somehow this show was so good that it nearly made up for all that time missed, pissing around with guest hosts and midgets pretending to be leprechauns pretending to be sons of Finlay.

I don't need to go into specifics, but this show had great wrestling, great promos, and even great backstage segments - all of which didn't make you feel humiliated or embarrassed to be a wrestling fan! I could've literally watched that with my parents, girlfriend (I did, for some of it!), and maybe even someone I barely knew - and no one could laugh at me!

RAW should be ashamed of itself! Fuck you, RAW!

Never been so jacked after a WWE show. Hope the Rumble doesn't strip me of my happiness.

Friday, January 29, 2010

WHOA: DAVEY RICHARDS PULLED FROM DGUSA, EVOLVE EVENTS

Thanks to Monkey Man for alerting me to such a puzzling tweet from Gabe himself.

Can't really guess what the hell this means. Either way, it's bizarre. Hopefully nothing super crazy.

In other news, Smackdown! is off to a wild start. Should destroy RAW yet again. Even with the bait and switch of Teddy Long changing the Tag Title match to two new singles matches, it's still going to be a good lineup.

But seriously WTF DAVEY?! I can only speculate that he got EVEN MORE COMPETITIVE and kicked Gabe's booking book of secret booking plans into his face, then EVOLVED into a DRAGONZORD.

I don't know what any of this means, I'm just all hyped up on Smackdown.

2009 IN REVIEW: COMPLETE!

And not a month and too soon!

Here's all the tags you need to browse through the entire recap in sections:


So long, 2009.

Thursday, January 28, 2010

2009 IN REVIEW: HOME STRETCH

As I mentioned in my last post, it's taking a coon's age (a COON'S!) to finish this 2009 review. I didn't have too much left to cover, but I didn't want to just leave these things behind.

So here is what remains of my 2009 review:

MOMENTS
2009

CM PUNK CASHES IN - AGAIN
I got nervous nerd sweats when Punk came out and cashed in his MITB contract on Jeff Hardy, in fear of him being the first guy to fail. But he didn't. And I nerd-rejoiced. Unlike this guy. Holy fuck is that hilarious to listen to.

SEEING KENTA AND NAKAJIMA LIVE IN THE SAME YEAR
I was super lucky this past year as I got to see both KENTA and Katsuhiko Nakajima wrestle live in front of my face, both for ROH events. The atmosphere was incredible for both of them.

ROH WORLD TITLE CHANGES
After 545 days of Nigel McGuinness holding the ROH World Title, two title changes in the same year was massive. The crowd reactions are always goose-pimply to watch.

SANTINO MARELLA
Santino is, full-stop, the funniest man to come through the WWE since Chris Jericho. No matter how bad RAW would get, if Santino showed up, I could laugh through the tears.

STARS
2009
Photo courtesy of Scott Finkelstein's Get Lost Photography

NIGEL MCGUINNESS
Even with the two title changes this year, some people forget that Nigel still held the ROH belt for the first four months of this year, and knocked out some great matches before becoming Desmond Wolfe - where he was elevated to the main event (for a sec) with matches against Kurt Angle.

HONOURABLE MENTION: MIZ AND MORRISON
Both of these guys managed to succeed without their bro by winning the US and Intercontinental titles, respectively. Once it's time for them to step up to the main event, it'll feel special, as they've been making that climb nice and slow.

HONOURABLE MENTION: KOFI KINGSTON
Hey, apparently Kofi has charisma! All it took was for him to speak like he normally does, instead of with an accent they made him speak with! It's GENIUS! His feud with Randy Orton had it's ups and downs, and we'll have to wait for 2010 to see where it took him for keeps.

FEUDS
2009
Photo courtesy of Scott Finkelstein's Get Lost Photography

AMERICAN WOLVES VS. KEVIN STEEN & EL GENERICO
The blood feud of the year managed to spark what should be the blood feud of this year. With Steen and Generico losing to the Wolves, then ultimately, the Bucks at Final Battle, Kevin Steen turned on his best bud in a brutal way. But before that, Steenerico fought tooth and nail with the Wolves throughout 2009 and put forward some incredible matches.

HONOURABLE MENTION: CHRISTIAN VS. JACK SWAGGER
Remember when ECW was great? Well, I actually don't know how it is now, since it's been AWOL in Canada, but there was a time at the start of this year when ECW was awesome. Christian and Jack Swagger put on some fantastic TV matches the built to PPV matches, and had a great feud that pitted Christian, a super believable babyface that's easy to get behind, against Jack Swagger, the easier to hate, lisp carrying heel.

FML
2009

GUEST HOST CIRCUS
Kofi Johnson. Evan Braun. SummerFest. "The Show" Triple H. "The Man" Mark Henry. There's gotta be more. Bottom line: RAW was a dice roll every week since Donald Trump came round. Sometimes you rolled a 6 and scored Bob Barker. Other (most) times you rolled a 1 and got Joey Kyle and Jeff Joey or whoever the fuck those Nascar dorks were. Sometimes the show was a trainwreck. Other times it was a hit because of how much of a hilarious trainwreck it was. The worst part is that RAW is being sold to us as a show that asks you to tune in for, not wrestling (sometimes not even storylines!), but to buy whatever some Z-list celebrity is selling.

I can't wait to look back on this in a couple years and be reminded of how this gimmick cheapened any potentially good storyline (ex: Hey, remember that sweet feud DX had? It all started when Verne Troyer got mad because last week Cedric the Entertainer made a match that... ah gad).

HORNSWOGGLE/DXCAPADES
I don't understand the kind of person that is old enough to remember DX but laughs at Hornswoggle. Makes me want to barf.

KID ROCK'S WRESTLEMANIA AIRTIME
Dude spent like twenty minutes rocking out, and got more airtime than JBL/Mysterio from this year (probably countless other guys from other years - like Lance Storm who's got a grand total of 0 WM minutes!). And using his performance to introduce the divas for the battle royale was completely retarded, considering that no one even knew the ones that were returning. God DAMN.

LETDOWNS
2009

JACK SWAGGER MOVED TO RAW
Seriously. Swagger was getting deadly heat on ECW as the top heel. His move to RAW seemed like it was going to be a big deal. It wasn't. He's getting played like the "goofy" heel who loses every week. I fear for his career sometimes. Godspeed, Jack Swagger.

MATT HARDY
Another ECW-to-main-roster letdown. Matt Hardy still gets a pretty big pop for a guy that's done nothing for the past who knows how long. Teaming with The Great Khali has to be a bummer.

TRANSFORMED
2009
Photo courtesy of Scott Finkelstein's Get Lost Photography

CHRIS HERO - TO - THAT YOUNG KNOCKOUT KID
Hero went from being a guy that wasn't featured on every ROH event, to a guy who his at the top of the main event scene. From Sweet 'N' Sour to concussing with his kicks and givin' KO's with his elbows. Hero is the real deal.

BIG SHOW - TO - ENTERTAINING?
Big Show started 2009 as a love interest for Vickie Guerrero. He then actually became entertaining when he found himself paired with Chris Jericho (can that man do ANY wrong?!), spending four months as an integral part of both RAW and Smackdown! But now he's back to being just same old angry Big Show. Eh.

"HEH HEH" BATISTA - TO - "UR SPOSEDA BE MY FRENNNN!!!" BATISTA
I, as much as anybody, was totally sick of that "I shrug off anything because wrestling is fake" Batista. Batista makes so much more sense as a heel to me. And he's killing it on Smackdown! right now.

LIVE
2009

ROH IN NOVI - "ARIES VS. RICHARDS"
Austin Aries vs. Davey Richards was the best match I've ever seen live. The rest of the show, wasn't as great, because that would be impossible, but it was still totally awesome. Steenerico vs. The Young Bucks ruled, as did Hero/Strong. The other highlight would have to be Omega facing Nakajima, which, if I remember correctly, had kind of a fucked up finish, but only because Omega was dropped on his head earlier in the match with a super high angle German Suplex.

ROH IN MISSISSAUGA - "THE OMEGA EFFECT"
Omega vs. Aries was a fantastic match, but maybe not quite as good as Aries' match the night before with Davey. The show was, again, awesome, with Generico/Nakajima maybe topping Omega/Nakajima. I got to see some sweet live wrestling this year.

And that's all. Stay tuned for my final wrap-up that will separate all categories for easy navigation. NEAT!

MATCHES, STARS 2009: FEATURING DAVEY RICHARDS

Okay, this 2009 recap is just spiralling out of control (and into February), so I think it's about time to wrap things up.

I was hoping to hold off on mentioning matches until I finished watching the Final Countdown tour, but that's not going to happen for a few days, and I want to put a stamp on this thing by the weekend.

So that brings me to this alternate-style of recapping the matches of 2009...

2009 IN MATCHES
AKA A YEAR OF DAVEY RICHARDS

Nobody else put on as many great matches this past year as Davey Richards. In fact, let's see what that looks like (Davey vs. everybody else):

MOTY'S WITH DAVEY RICHARDS
Davey Richards vs. KENTA (ROH: Supercard of Honor IV)
Davey Richards vs. Shingo (DGUSA: Open The Untouchable Gate)
Davey Richards vs. Kevin Steen (ROH: Never Say Die)
Davey Richards vs. Austin Aries (ROH: Aries vs. Richards)
American Wolves vs. Tyler Black and Bryan Danielson (ROH: World Tag Title Classic)
American Wolves vs. Roderick Strong & KENTA (ROH: Violent Tendencies)
American Wolves vs. Young Bucks (ROH: ROH On HDNet)
American Wolves vs. Kevin Steen & El Generico (ROH: Glory By Honor VIII) (Okay, still haven't seen it, but if it doesn't end up in this list after I see it, I assume it was because my eyes fell out of my head or something)

MOTY'S WITHOUT DAVEY RICHARDS
Shawn Michaels vs. The Undertaker (WWE: WrestleMania XXV)
Chris Jericho vs. Rey Mysterio (WWE: The Bash)
Chris Hero vs. Eddie Kingston (ROH: Final Battle 2009)
Bryan Danielson vs. Tyler Black (ROH: ROH On HDNet)
Nigel McGuinness vs. KENTA (ROH: 7th Anniversary Show)
CM Punk vs. Jeff Hardy (WWE: SummerSlam)
Austin Aries vs. Tyler Black vs. Jerry Lynn (ROH: Manhattan Mayhem III)

I'm obviously missing tons of stuff here (TNA, PWG, CHIKARA, NOAH, etc.), but I can only go by what I've seen this year, and I really don't see much of the above, although I will be getting around to it this year (minus TNAlol).

And I'm even probably missing some stuff that I have seen and just plum forgot about, but I'm just rifling these off of the top of my head and taking it a little more casually.

And maybe I'm being a little (a lot) biased because of the title of this post. So while this post seems to be all high and mighty on Davey, despite me not seeing every wrestling match to happen in 2009, I'm sticking by my word!

ENOUGH EXCUSES!

The point is Davey was in a shocking amount of stellar matches this year. And he is well on his way to becoming a world champion outside of FIP.

Photo courtesy of Scott Finkelstein's Get Lost Photography.

CLAUDIO UFO'S MORISHIMA - IN GIF FORM!

From Chris Hero's Twitter. Click image for the gif.


Can't wait for video form.

Wednesday, January 27, 2010

WHAT I MISSED WHILE I WAS BARFING

Oh gad. I just spent the last day puking my guts out. I think I ate me a rotten jalapeno popper. Not a good time.

So, to catch up, here's what I missed while I had my head buried in the toilet:

MONDAY NIGHT RAW
WISHED I WAS BARFING

I actually got to see RAW before the barfing got underway. It, aside from Cena's promo, was borrrrring. But that doesn't matter since I (and a ton of other people) will be ordering the Rumble anyway.

ROH TV TITLE TOURNAMENT
BRACKETS FILLED IN

No Roddy or Tyler makes sense to me, and had Kenny Omega not been in Japan, maybe he could've fit in. Either way, this tournament should be exciting to watch. I can't see it being a Steen/Generico final, makes sense for them to save their match for a little longer down the road (plus they don't really need the title for their feud). I could easily see Kenny King or even Eddie Edwards winning - but I'm not sure.

SANTINO MARELLA
SITCOM STAR?!

YES PLEASE

AND FINALLY
2009 WRESTLING OBSERVER NEWSLETTER AWARDS

With Chris Jericho taking Wrestler of the Year for the second year in a row! And Bryan Danielson continuing his streak of unstoppable glory! And look at my crudely thrown-together graphic up there!

CLASS A AWARDS
Wrestler of the Year: Chris Jericho
MMA Most Valuable Fighter: Brock Lesnar
Most Outstanding Wrestler: Bryan Danielson
Most Outstanding Fighter: Georges St. Pierre
Best Box Office Draw: Brock Lesnar
Feud of the Year: CM Punk vs. Jeff Hardy
Tag Team of the Year: The American Wolves
Most Improved: The Miz
Best on Interviews: Chris Jericho
Most Charismatic: John Cena
Best Technical Wrestler: Bryan Danielson
Best Brawler: Necro Butcher
Best Flying Wrestler: Kota Ibushi
Most Overrated: Triple H
Most Underrated: Evan Bourne
Promotion of the Year: UFC
Best Weekly TV Show: Smackdown
Match of the Year: Undertaker vs. Shawn Michaels
MMA Fight of the Year: Diego Sanchez vs. Clay Guida
Rookie of the Year: Frightmare
Best Non-Wrestler: Vickie Guerrero
Best Announcer: Jim Ross
Worst Announcer: Michael Cole
Best Major Wrestling Show: DGUSA: Open the Historical Gate

CLASS B AWARDS
Worst Major Wrestling Show: TNA Victory road
Best Wrestling Maneuver: More Bang for Your Buck (The Young Bucks)
Most Disgusting Promotional Tactic: Piggy James angle
Worst TV Show: Impact
Worst Match of the Year: Sharmell vs. Jenna Morasca
Worst Feud of the Year: Chavo Guerrero vs. Hornswoggle
Worst Promotion of the Year: TNA
Best Booker: Joe Silva
Promoter of the Year: Dana White
Best Gimmick: CM Punk
Worst Gimmick: Hornswoggle
Best Pro Wrestling Book: Midnight Express 25th Anniversary Scrapbook by Jim Cornette
Best Pro Wrestling DVD: Macho Madness

Sunday, January 24, 2010

NEW LANCE STORM COMMENTARY RAISES MY SELF-ESTEEM

http://www.stormwrestling.com/012310.html

LANCE STORM
IMPACT PLAYER-HATER

Holy crap how's that for a goddamn headline?!

...

So basically what I mean is, I feel douchey for hating on TNA after thinking it could be on the upswing. And I hate tearing down a wrestling show/company just for the hell of it, unless if it's totally justified. So I guess what Storm's commentary is doing is making me feel justified in why I'm not into TNA right now. It's like I can cite a textbook when I dump on TNA. And that textbook is Lance Storm.

Essentially, if you're too lazy to read (c'mon reading is EASY!), Storm just lists the simple, logical things that TNA is doing ass-backwards.

I think my favourite part is Storm trying to make sense of the Orlando Screwjob:

1) If Hebner was going to “Montreal” Kurt and screw him, why didn’t he do it when AJ had him in the Figure 4 Leg Lock earlier in the match?

2) Why did Kurt assume Hogan had anything to do with this? Hogan was the guy who gave him the second chance in the first place. If Hogan wasn’t on Kurt’s side he could have just stuck to the stipulation from the PPV and not given Kurt the opportunity of this match that he would then have to screw him out of later. This was so stupid.

3) How can anyone believe that Kurt is going to quit over this, like he threatened to do at the end of this show. Bobby Lashley has been trying to quit for weeks now but can’t because he is under contract. TNA has already established, on this very show, that guys can’t quit! Doesn’t anyone in TNA watch TNA? Maybe if they did the ratings would be better.

4) The Montreal finish makes no sense when the reigning champ is the one going over! Why bother conspiring with a ref, and fighting this whole match when you are the reigning champion? AJ could just get DQ’d, counted out; you name it, and still retain his title. The whole point of Montreal was that Shawn had to get a pin fall or submission on the existing champ in order to WIN the title. Doesn’t anyone pay attention to details anymore?

I don't know why it's so difficult for TNA (or WWE, they're bad offenders too) to take a step back, look at what they've planned for the show, and just try and poke plotholes in it. Because that's what a ton of fans do when they're watching. And it seems to just get easier by the second with TNA.

Storm hits on pretty much every aspect of TNA last show, and in a fair way, because he gives reasons and has so much knowledge about booking that it's impossible to refute his claims.

Just makes me feel less bad when I watch TNA and frown for two hours.

Saturday, January 23, 2010

DRAGON GATE USA: FREEDOM FIGHT PPV REVIEW THAT'S NOT ABOUT MATCHES!

It's only not about matches because everyone and their tag team partner (I modified that old saying to be wrestling themed!!) will talk about them - and for good reason. They were punch-yourself-in-the-head awesome. Literally exhausting to watch. In the best way.

But since errrbody else has the matches covered (PWInsider covered them really well, and tons of people have their own reviews), I just want to mention a couple other things. Starting with this fella:

JON MOXLEY
WHO ARE YOU BUD

I had never seen Moxley up until last night, and I was impressed. Granted, he didn't wrestle. But he did cut a pretty cool (Heath Ledger comparisons will probably be drawn) promo, and momentarily align himself with Brian Kendrick in a neat segment.

What I like about him is that he could totally stand out in a promotion that's all about workrate by having so much personality (or so it seemed just from last night).

I know nothing about this guy, but I felt like he should get some due while the rest of the wrestling blog/twitter/community/etc. will be all over the matches.

Uh... well, which they should be. Shit was bananas.

Also, tonight (actually right now) Dragon Gate USA is taping an event in Chicago with yet another stacked card, pushing them closer by the second to my 2010 prediction.

"FEARLESS" PAY-PER-VIEW TAPING
OPEN THE FREEDOM GATE TITLE MATCH
BxB Hulk defends vs. Dragon Kid
FIP WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT TITLE MATCH
Masaaki Mochizuki defends vs. Davey Richards
ELIMINATION THREE-WAY TAG TEAM DREAM MATCH
Shingo & YAMATO vs. The Young Bucks vs. Naruki Doi & Masato Yoshino
TAG TEAM CHALLENGE MATCH
CIMA & Super Crazy vs. Mike Quackenbush & Jigsaw
SPECIAL ATTRACTION MATCH #1
Brian Kendrick vs. Jimmy Jacobs
SPECIAL ATTRACTION MATCH #2
Gran Akuma vs. TJP
PLUS
Tommy Dreamer will appear (or, uh... some other "Extreme" "Innovator of Violence")

This card is just completely loaded from top to bottom. I can only hope that someday Dragon Gate makes the trip to Toronto. Or maybe I'll have to make a trip to Dragon Gate.

Wednesday, January 20, 2010

TRANSFORMED 2009: EDDIE EDWARDS

EDDIE EDWARDS
2008

Just over a year ago, Eddie Edwards teamed with Davey Richards for the very first time, losing to the Briscoes and the team of Claudio Castagnoli and Nigel McGuinness. The next night, the American Wolves injured Mark Briscoe. This was the first step to transform Eddie Edwards into Eddie Edwards -

AMERICAN WOLF
2009

Eddie Edwards proved his complete badassery in 2009 by aligning himself with Davey and holding the ROH World Tag Team Championship for over eight months. He also showed off just how much he's learned in the Pro Wrestling NOAH Dojo by wrestling like a man HELLBENT ON VIOLENCE.

But Eddie's crowning moment came (er, unfortunately to him) when he broke his elbow (broken elbow jesus lord) in an anything goes match with Kevin Steen, and still finished the ANYTHING GOES MATCH, including taking a Package Piledriver. Through FOUR CHAIRS.

After word got out that his elbow was broken, everyone was just flat-out assuming that Eddie wouldn't be able to compete (or at least praying he wouldn't be crazy enough to compete) in the biggest match to be hyped by ROH in a long while - the second-ever Ladder War at Glory By Honor VIII.

Not only did he wrestle (bandaged up like he'd been shot)... but he put himself crazy over in the eyes of the fans. People were shocked that he was willing to put his body at such a high risk in such an insane match, but Eddie Edwards proved he was a goddamn psycho, and maybe one of the toughest dudes in the ROH locker room.

What a crazy bastard.

2009: Eddie Edwards to American Wolf

Photos courtesy of Scott Finkelstein's Get Lost Photography (totally ripped this from TH).

WHOA: ROH USHERS IN TV TITLE WITH TOURNAMENT

YAY.

This is so sweet. It's been talked about for so long, and to see it actually happen is really cool. I'm not sure who'll win it, or even who'll be involved - but why don't I speculate anyhow?

Here are the announced names for the TV tapings on February 4th and 5th, which is when the tournament will take place:

Tyler Black; Roderick Strong; The American Wolves of Davey Richards & Eddie Edwards; Kenny King; The Kings of Wrestling: "That Young Knock Out Kid" Chris Hero & Claudio Castagnoli; Erick Stevens w/ Prince Nana; Delirious w/ Daizee Haze El Generico; Steve Corino; Kevin Steen; The Dark City Fight Club; The Necro Butcher; “Addicted to Love” Rhett Titus and “Skullkrusher” Rasche Brown

And here's my guess/hopes of who will be the eight men filling in the brackets:

Tyler Black
Roderick Strong
Davey Richards
Eddie Edwards
Kenny King
Rasche Brown
Necro Butcher
El Generico

Actually I have no clue. Delirious could easily be in there too. I'm just thinking of guys who get pushed on TV a lot.

Can't wait to see how this plays out, and what it could mean for future shows. It's great that ROH will be able to have another way to turn a regular singles match into a BIG time match.

Tuesday, January 19, 2010

LIVE 2009: SMACKDOWN! IN HAMILTON - 09/15/09

The third show I went to this past year was my first WWE one since the year before (which was my first one since 1997 (the best of the three (maybe I should review it as a growned up))).

When we got our tickets to the show, we were, for lack of a better phrase, giddy as pigs in poo. Smackdown! had been on a tear of brilliance for a little while when we picked up the tickets in June with Punk, Edge and Jeff Hardy owning in the main event, and Evan Bourne, Jack Swagger and Christian killing it on ECW, which also would be taped that night.

We were so PSYCHED, and I don't say psyched because that's lame. BUT WE WERE PSYCHED.

Then shit started to go down.

Edge went out with an injury.

Hardy took a break from wrestling to make up lost time with his drugs.

Bourne, Swagger and Mark Henry were moved to RAW to capitalize on their incredible success on ECW (a.k.a. job to Sheamus and Santino).

Kane and Khali began feuding.

Rey Mysterio got suspended for druggin'.

But these are all not the worst of it.

Oh no.

Because a few weeks or so before our taping, it was announced that Batista would be making a career-changing statement on RAW - the day before our taping.

We thought two things:

1) Batista was hanging up his boots after too many torn-steroids. I mean steroids. I mean after doing too many steroids. I MEAN GETTING INJURED TOO MUCH.

Or.

2) He was going to Smackdown.

And by god, what had to happen? What had to happen on the day we were going to see Smackdown? What had to happen that was the final nail in the coffin of what was once a red hot wrestling show?

I think you know where I'm going with this.

BATISTA
RETURNS TO SMACKDOWN!

Right back atcha, Dave!

We weren't pleased. Neither was the guy in the front row giving Big Dave the bird the whole night (Batista's response can be seen above).

The show itself wasn't very good. The saving grace was we got to see a promo by World Heavyweight Champion CM Punk, as well as a dark match between him and Undertaker.

Other than that, pretty average. And we were second row. :(

HIGHLIGHTS
- The kid next to us had this sign:


- Hart Dynasty are great to see live, even if it's against Cryme Tyme.
- Chris Jericho is a god or deity of some kind.
- The fireworks blowing your asshole out when you're on the floor like twenty feet away from them. Jesus. It made me cheer Batista I was so excited.
- ECW Battle Royal was fun.
- Seeing Christian live was really cool. He's always been one of my favourites and he got a really good reaction, being from Orangeville and all. I literally forget who he wrestled though.
- John Morrison doing a bonkers crazy dive onto Mike Knox.

LOWLIGHTS
- EVERYTHING ELSE
- Kane/Khali segment!
- Khali ushered out on a stretcher gets a Khali chant.
- Dolph vs. Finlay getting "boring" chants, despite putting on the best mat wrestling all night.
- This:


- The whole screwjob angle between Taker and Punk had just happened, so that took up some time. And was stupid. Just. Stupid.
- I could go on for a while.

So here's some photos!






And the matches:

SMACKDOWN!
MAIN EVENT
Batista vs. Chris Jericho
NON-TITLE MATCH
John Morrison vs. Mike Knox
NON-TITLE MATCH
Melina vs. Michelle McCool
SINGLES MATCH
The Great Khali vs. Kane
TAG TEAM MATCH
The Hart Dynasty vs. Cryme Tyme

ECW
TEN MAN BATTLE ROYAL
Zack Ryder becomes #1 Contender
SINGLES MATCH
William Regal vs. The Hurricane
SINGLES MATCH
Yoshi Tatsu vs. Zack Ryder

SUPERSTARS
SINGLES MATCH
Christian vs. Paul Burchill
SINGLES MATCH
Dolph Ziggler vs. Finlay